Brick by Brick

It's Friday afternoon, though it feel like a Saturday due the fact that Cody got off at noon, and i'm passing time waiting for Miss Addalie to fall asleep. A late nap is better than no nap at all for that princess. Without a nap by  6pm she done for. Not just crabby, or sleepy, but literally can not keep her eyes open lost in a daze tired. I just finished reading the first chapter of Bloom by Kelle Hampton, and I can't wait to read the whole book. There is no doubt about it that it's going to be one of those that I stay up until 4 in the morning finishing till the very last word is read. I would love to write my memoir soon. I need a place to keep all my memories, positive and negative, where I can come back to and share. Share the way if felt becoming a mom at 17, going from 21 to 31 in a years time, and everything in between. I am just not sure where to start. I know one day it will just come to me, and everything will flow out like it happened yesterday. Until that day comes i'm just livin'. Livin' in Tennessee that is. I have had moving boxes sitting in my entry way for over 3 days now. All this time I have wanted to start packing, and I feel like I have no clue where to start. We have moved a few times over the past 5 years, but there is nothing like driving cross country with 3 kids, 2 dogs, a cat, and every single object you own. It's nerve wrecking and exciting to say the very least. Planning, packing, driving over 2,200, none of that gives me anxiety. That's a breeze. It's what comes next that makes my tummy turn. It's finding a new house, new everything, and settling in to a new life. It's finding that "homey" feeling. 

Moving here has taken me down a road I never knew existed, and i'm sure it's not the last one of the sort I will travel down. "Never be afraid to fall apart because it is an opportunity to rebuild yourself the way you wish you had been all along." I came across this on Pinterest the other day, and nothing has ever made more sense to me. It stopped me like nothing ever has. Moving here was meant to be. I was suppose to fall apart because I never let myself  before. I have been a "tough girl" my entire teenage and adult life. I have always accepted, turned it into a positive, and carried on. I was suppose to rebuild and become the person that I wanted to be.  I am finally whole again. I am not the me I was searching for over months of falling into a deep dark hole. I am a new me. The me I wish I had been all along. Happy Birthday to Me.