One year ago tonight it was just you and me baby. All I wanted to do was hold you in my arms. I could already smell that yummy baby smell, and see you in the tiny booties I had crocheted. You no longer fit those, and every time you eat I basically have to give you a bath or that baby smell is not too yummy. You are laying on your daddy right now, both fast asleep on the couch next to me. You are a big soul in a little body Liv. You are smart and cleaver, and are nothing short of a character. You are part of all of us...in you I see Aiden's trickery and generosity, Addalie's stubbornness and loving heart, your Dad's off the wall sense of humor, and my tendency to find something to love in almost everything. You are my joy, my world.
One year ago tonight, I slept as much as I could between contractions and waking in hopes I soon would get to officially meet my newest love. Around 6:30am, after 25 hours of unmedicated labor I caved. I wanted that epidural. I needed that epidural. I really desired to have a natural birth experience after having a c-section and an induced VBAC...I wanted this for you and I both, but I wasn't sure if I could be that strong any longer. In movies they show women screaming out in pain demanding someone do SOMETHING, ANYTHING to help. Well, thats not just in the movies, and no matter how much I didn't want to be that woman, I was. Right when the needle was about to enter I knew you were ready, and I think you knew how I wanted you to enter this beautiful world. I recall throwing myself back onto the bed and crying in relief and fear. A doctor was called in, and a few short pushes later you cuddled up on my chest...and it all just felt right. It was like we needed each other and finally, at last we had it. From that moment on we have had this incredible bond that will last forever. I love you Olivia Brooke with everything I have. Tomorrow is your day, and it's going to be ever so special. At the end of writing this you are now back on my lap where you sleep the best and I love the most.
Love, Mommy
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